Writing again after so many months.
So, lots of things had happened. Ups and down. Good and bad. Laugh and tears. From having a job to unemployed. From having a good friend to lost that person. And along with that journey, what makes me sad is, somehow I lost myself.
I mean, I was trying my best find out what was it? How could that happen? I even try to make it right. Not really succeed and eventually, for the 1st time in life, I became a bitter person. Feels like I hate everything and everyone. And I hated myself for that. It was tiring, exhausting. I can’t stand it anymore.
Luckily, these past few days (and for the next few days) my cell phone is dead. It suddenly died one night and when I took it the repairman, they need to replace one of its spare parts which will take some time. This situation really gives me time to think and talk to myself. A serious conversation I believe. And I decided to let it go. I need to stop fixing things. Sometimes it just meant to be broken. I need to stop hoping that my friendship with that person will be okay. It takes two to tango. No matter how hard I try if no response, so what’s the use? Sometimes, there are people who just not meant to stay for a long time in my life.
As said in above picture, I’m on a journey to detox all negativity in me. I need to cut that infection in my wounded heart before it spread and killing me softly. I need to stop myself from turning into someone I don’t even like. I can’t and surely don’t have the right to change others. But I definitely can change myself.
And you… if you never hear anything from me again, it simply because I don’t want us to hurt each other in any possible way. It’s better to remember you as a sweet memory, a smile from the past rather than to talk to you as a stranger. Be happy always.